HAK
by Deepcheese
Summary: Three very strange and possibly rabid girls crash, quite literally, into the naruto characters lives, bringing with them a new village, a talking wedge of cheese, paranoid schizophrenia, identity crisis, demons, and a giant sheep SasukeOC, GaaraOc, LeeOC
1. Chapter 1

H-A-K

I-M-O

S-A-H

A-Y-A

E-A-K

-----U

Prologue-

A Desolate Land

--

Sora heard the Gumi ships engines slowly fade to a rest behind him as he surveyed the land around him. It was certainly not a very hospitable place.

The only people, and, frankly, the only signs that this wasteland of a place was inhabited at all, other then the occasional shrubbery, were three girls, walking together in a vain attempt to get some sort of shelter from the wind.

Their appearance was far from impressive. All seemed to be in an extreme want of food, not to mention sleep, and to be wearing ill fitting, dirty, and all together worn down clothes.

The shortest of the three struggled to keep her excessively long black hair from stabbing her in her already puffy red eyes. For a moment, she seemed to notice him, and motioned to the other two to his direction. She started to whisper something to the other two, but the wind blew her hair straight into her mouth, and she started to choke.

The one standing to the right of her started to pat the dark haired one on the back, yet did not seem to be making any progress on dislodging the stray hair from her companions throat, as every motion that she made carried with it a strange amount of fatigue with it, her slight pale blue eyes weary, almost empty. Her wavy brown hair was obviously giving her problems too,

The tallest, somewhat lanky and more then slightly frail looking one of the bunch seemed to catch what the dark haird one was trying to say, and pointed at something behind Sora. She said something, although Sora was to far away to hear exactly what. They started walking toward him, and he quickly averted his eyes. They walked past him without saying anything, and he didn't perticularyly want to know what the inhabitants of this wasteland were like.

He sared up at the thirsty blue sky, when suddenly, a strange noise enveloped him.

It sounded… almost like running engines.

He jerked his head around, shocked to find his ship taking off without him, and the three girls nowhere in sight.

He ran after them, but they and the ship were long gone, leaving him in the wretched wasteland that was Wyoming.

--

AN: I was sort of annoyed with all of the OCs that were all described as being perfect looking, despite the fact that they just got out of a battle, and can be lost for several days without seeming the least bit malnourished. I'm going to try to keep these OCs at least somewhat realistic in that sense. If I ever start making mistakes, especially regarding Naruto Canon, I would appreciate some constructive criticism. And by constructive criticism, I do NOT mean flames.

I think that I may set the story in the filler ark- less pressure that way.

Please R&R peoples, and I'll return the favor!


	2. Falling stars

HAK- ch. 1

Falling Stars

--

Space was beautifull. For a gorgeous moment, it seemed that everything was perfect, crystallized in this dark world.

The moment seemed like it would last forever, until Kohaku brushed some of her long lack hair out of her face and stared at the control panel.

Finally, she spoke"Umm… Guys? Where are the breaks on this thing?"  
They both stared. One of Amaya's golden-yellow eyes twitched.

Then all chaos broke loose.

"WHO SAID THAT YOU COULD DRIVE?!" Amaya screamed, distraught  
"SHUT UP! AS IF YOU COULD DO ANY BETTER! NEED I REMIND YOU ABOUT THAT ACCIDENT THAT YOU HAD WITH THE GOLF CART AND THE BRICK WALL?"  
"That's a compleately different matter!"  
Hisae held up her hands, trying to be the peacemaker. "We probably should figure out how to drive this thing before we crash into something."  
Kohaku glared. "Shut up, Hisae! I'm trying to figure this out!"  
Hisae grumbled something inaudible, although, by the sounds of it, she was not thinking pleasant thoughts.

Amaya had rolled into a ball without anyone noticing, shaking. "I don't want to die!" She cried, pulling at her short hair with her hands.

Kohaku had resorted to hitting the control panel with her hands, a look of sheer anger and frustration on her face. Something in the control panel crunched under one of her fists.

There was the sound of engines dying down.

Silence coverd the ship, as everyone seemed to be registering what just happened. The silence was slowly broken as Amaya broke into a fit of nervous laughter, rocking herself back and forth. Kohaku gave a very loud scream, red eyes wide and angry.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?" Hisae screamed, fingers twitching.

Kohaku just screamed some more, and attempted to bang whatever had broken back into place, which just ended up smashing the control panel beyond repair.

Hisae looked at Kohaku in shock. Kohaku looked back, quite obviously distressed. "Whateverjust happened, it's your fault!"  
"You're the one that smashed it."  
"That's not how I remember it!" Kohaku screamed, intent on blaming this whole ordeal on someone other than herself. "It's always your fault! Didn't you see her smash it, Amaya?"  
Amaya didn't answer, her yellow eyes had glazed over, and she had begun whispering to herself. "_It's going to be okay. It's going to be okay…" _She repeated over and over again as she rocked back and forth neurotically.

Kohaku didn't seem to notice. "See! She agrees with me! It's all your fault, Hisae!"  
"How on earth do you get an agreement out of that?"

Neither one of them seemed to notice that they were approaching a planet. Fast.

"You just don't want to admit that this is all your fault!"  
"How is it my fault?"  
"It dosen't matter, it just is!"

"Why?"  
The planet was approaching.

Some sort of realization seemed to dawn on Amaya, and she fearfully pointed at the growing planet beyond the window.

The two stopped arguing to find that they were about to crash.

"We're going to die, aren't we?" Hisae asked no one in particular, not really wanting an answer anyway.

Kohaku narrowed her eyes. "This thig has got to have lifeboats or life- whatever." She tried not to notice the fact that they were accelerating. "We have to find them. Now."  
Amaya seemed to come out of her shock at this point, and ran as fast as she could along the ship to find the life-whatevers. Meaning that she got there considerably after the other two had gotten there. (she was… slow)

"Hurry up! We don't have much time!"  
"How do we work these things?" Amaya shouted, distressed.  
"I don't know! It can't he that hard!" Kohaku shouted back, trying to get the door on hers to close, and not having much success.  
"Says the person that caused this whole thing."  
"Shut up Hisae!"

Hisae made a face, and disappeared into her life-whatever.

"Yeah, you'd better run!" Kohaku shouted, finally getting the door of hers to close.

All that was left was Amaya.

She stared at all of the controls, and, in an all too frequent blond moment, did what one is never supposed to do under any circumstances.  
She pushed the red button.

And then she was shooting out of the ship in her life-whatever, sincerely wishing that she know what the whatever was, so that she could properly know what to call her soon to be grave as she crashed into the ocean.

--

The other two, it seemed, were having a lot more trouble getting their life-whatever to deploy from the main ship, which had begun to shake badly. Finally, Kohaku managed to escape, and glided not-quite-so-gracefully into the forest below.

Hisae, on the other hand, was not quite so lucky. No matter how many times she pushed the stupid button, it just didn't want to deploy. The very core of the ship seemed to rock with the approaching planet. Frustrated, she hit her head on the control panel, and felt a small welt begin to form on her head where some odd piece of metal had struck her. _Figures. Why did I just do that anyway?_

The ship was shaking, and she was suddenly overwhelmed by the sense that something bad was going to happen very soon.

She was right, as the whole thing crashed into the earth merely seconds later.


	3. Chapter 3

Authors note: okay, finally on the Naruto world. Hope that you didn't mind the needlessly long introduction.

In case I didn't mention, this takes place after the chunin exams, but before the whole retrieve Sasuke arc.

I don't own Naruto.

Chapter 3-

And then, everybody died……… no, wait….

--

--

It was a bright and shining day in Konoha, and the streets were full of life. The trees blew in the soft breeze, and the faint smell of ramen wafted through the air.

Naruto Uzamaki inhaled the sweet, sweet scent deeply, wistfully wishing that he had some extra money to buy some of the really good stuff. Maybe after his next mission, then he would treat himself. It seemed like forever since he had gone to Ichirakus, so he had just been living off of the pre-packaged stuff. Which was still great, of course, but it just wasn't the same somehow.

In the distance, there was a sudden thud as something strange and not from this world landed in the nearby forest. Naruto turned to look at it, wondering if what on earth it was.

Meanwhile, in the smoking crater surrounded by fallen trees, there was a sound almost like a sputtering cough as the door to a battered escape pod opened. Then there was a real cough, as Kohaku climbed out of the twisted, steaming pile of metal, rubbing the sores on her body. She had been slightly burnt in the fall, but fortunately seemed to be okay. Sure, her cloths where covered in soot, and charred beyond all possible repair, but she knew that she had probably gotten off easily.

_I wonder where the others are? _

She scanned the skyline, and for a moment thought that she saw the trail of one, but it disappeared before she could tell where it was headed.

_Can't be much worse off then I am. I have absolutely NO idea where I am._

--

MEANWHILE, in the middle of a desert:

Hisae stumbled through the desert, wondering why on earth she was always the unlucky one.

_So thirsty. I need water._

She had no idea where the others had landed, but she knew that it couldn't be much worse then this. She knew what her luck was like, and that there was absolutely no way she was going to find civilization before she died from thirst.

--

MEANWHILE, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN:  
"Oh my God!" Amaya gasped, struggling to find breath. "There's too much water here! I'm going to drown!"

She flopped her hands helplessly against the tides, looking somewhat like a decapitated chicken that had just been thrown into the middle of the ocean.

--

Meanwhile, Kohaku sighed, pulling her extremely tangled hair once again out of her face. They would both be fine, she knew, probably better off then she was, with sores everywhere, not a clue where she was, and the strangest sense that she was being watched.

Suddenly, three men with the strangest masks that you have ever seen appeared, moving so quickly that you could barely see them.

"Who are you guys?" She shouted, startled.

"Why don't YOU tell us who you are? Did you just try to attack the village?"  
"Village? Sweet, there's a village nearby! That means that I'm not in the middle of nowhere! Thanks, dude!" She began to walk away.

The Anbu men pulled out their kunai. "Don't move. You used some sort of jutsu to destroy those trees. What was it?"  
"What in Hells name is a 'jutsu'?"  
"You are not being funny. If you continue to mock us, you will be sorry."  
"And if you guys keep threatening me, then _you_ will be the ones to be sorry. I'm really not in the best of moods right now- my head is killing me, and if you start to try to boss me around _one more time_, then I swear, all hell is going to break lose."

The three men looked at each other. Looked back at her. "She just threatened us, didn't she?" the duck-man said.

"Yes, I suppose that she did. And you know what that means, don't you?" replied the cat-man.

Suddenly the third popped in. "That means that we get to use force!" He sounded oddly excited about this fact.

Kohaku bit her lower lip. It was three against one. Those weren't good odds, and these guys seemed to know what they were doing. They weren't like those hapless villagers back home that would fall with a single blow; she could tell that much already. But just how good were they? She decided that she didn't want to find out.

"Okay. I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I just said. I'm just a little lost and confused right now, so… could you guys point me in the direction of the nearest village. _Please._"

She hadn't meant for that last word to sound sarcastic, but it did regardless. As the three Anbu men began to approach, she began to curse her natural ability to needlessly piss off all the people who were looking for an excuse to get violent.

--

Hisae wondered aimlessly through the desert for almost an hour before she finally tripped of a pile of sand and fell over, exhausted.

"It's so hot…. I need water" As if by magic, she looked up, and spotted something resting in the distant sand.

_What's that?_ She thought. _A… Gourd?_

And then, an impossible hope-

_Could it be that there's water in it?_

Consumed by her immense thirst, she fumbled her way to the gourd, opened the top, and started pouring its contents into her mouth.

And then immediately spit it back out.

"What the CRAP?! This isn't water at all! Who the hell carries a bunch of sand around in the middle of a desert!"

As if on cue, Gaara appeared from behind a sand dune which he had been hiding behind for some reason. "That is mine"

"This is yours? Seriously dude, what the hell. Do you know what that stuff tasted like?"

Gara just responded with angry silence, and then the words "…. Sand Coffin."

--

Meanwhile, Amaya floated across the ocean.

"You know, this really isn't so bad, once you get used to it." She didn't seem to notice that she was only five feet away from the shore. But gradually, she drifted towards it.

Finally she ran aground.

"Land!" She exclaimed, genuinely surprised by this discovery.

She jumped out of the water, threw her arms into the air and shouted "I hereby declare this new land CHEESELAND in honor of cheese, the best thing ever!"

--

To be continued-!


End file.
